Will he Change with Time?

Question: Lauren from Columbus, OH asks:

You will tell by the time you finish reading this that I am deeply troubled with my relationship. My man is in a band and I am a nanny . . . talk about different lifestyles. For a long time now, we have been living together and I pay for about 75% of the financial responsibilities, sometimes leaving no spend $ for myself. I have been pleading with him to do more romantic things like dinner, vacation, or a simple gesture other than just being home early enough to physically lay beside me. He claims that these things aren’t possible without money and he gets defensive. He says that once he’s successful things will change. Am I asking too much? How long do I wait for things to change?

Answer: REALationship.com Expert Team:

Lauren, waiting for things to change or pleading for them to change will not make them, or him, change. Change in a relationship and in partner is possible, but you have to know what to do, and that has nothing to do with pleading or waiting. On the other hand, it also has nothing to do with manipulation. Start by deciding what you want and making sure that you have it as much as possible by providing it for yourself.

  -RET

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